Sunday, December 30, 2012

Kittens Apologize For Party

Marketing Maniac: We are really sorry for trashing your house.

Liza: We or you? Because I don't see the other kittens here.

MM: Most were traumatized by the flattened dogs and the howling baby wolf. They're in counseling now. Deadbeat Kitten is claiming she can't do her edits due to her near death from the eggnog poisoning.

Liza: What about Tell Ado?

MM: She's okay. She's writing an original store about a Christmas party gone bad. At least I think it is. You haven't written a story about drunken kittens behaving badly, have you?

Liza: Not that I recall.

MM: I gave her Shakespeare and Snoozeball to type so her head won't get so big this time.

Liza: That was very thoughtful.

MM: Now, to prove my sincere sorriness for ever having that party, I made you a whole bunch of new marketing promos.

And, I've found you a new spokesperson. Not as cute as me, but he won't be prone to have parties.

 Liza: Maniac, you speak as if you're leaving? 

MM: After all the trouble I caused...I didn't think you wanted me anymore.

Liza: I'll agree you've been bad, but hey, who am I to cast stones. Did you see D'Ann's interview?

MM: *snickers* I think that was your best blog ever. And no one skimmed it. One even read it twice.

Liza: Yeah, those were my best comments yet...

MM: So you understand that breaking the rules can be refreshing. 

Liza: I suppose...

MM: So why did you nix my NYC building promo? I worked really hard on that.

Liza: Maniac, you may be a cute kitten who can get by with anything, but I'm not. You cannot plaster hundred foot tall signs on NYC buildings. 

MM: Why not?

Liza: Well, for one thing, the tenants can no longer see out the windows. They must feel like they're working in a very tall shoe box.

MM: Maybe you can send them copies of your book so they'll understand what a good cause they sit in the dark for.

Liza: No, I've ordered all those signs down.

MM: All of them?

Liza: We can keep the billboard. That's on public property.

MM: How about this promo?

Liza: That's Silas Condict Park, white trail. My lawyer says that's okay. Public land has no copyright issues. Although the nice ranger who created this trail might object.

MM: What trail? I don't see a trail.

Liza: It's hard to see, but see the tree in middle of the picture, the trail is to the right of that.

MM: Glad I don't have to hike with you. Further down, I've put your book in the tunnel cave on the rattlesnake ledge. Is that okay?

Liza: Yes, but don't be surprised if a hiker just grabs the book and takes it with him. Hikers tend to be readers.

MM: Don't worry, I've hired a bear to frisk them when they leave the cave.

Liza: *laughs* I've always thought that cave would make a nice sleepover for bears if only we didn't keep trudging through it.

MM: How about this one?

Liza: That's the swamp in Tourne Park, before they drained it. The swamp looks terrible now. How'd you get the words on the clouds?

MM: Spray paint.

Liza: You can do that?

MM: I can't, but I hired some crows. They're very clever.

Liza: Evidently. I had no idea clouds could be spray painted.

MM: Well, you have to hire the crows, because they've patented the technique. *smiles* See, I'm starting to pay attention to laws.

Liza: Well done! You're growing up.

MM: I am. Speaking of which, any chance I can have a giant mug. I've out grown my cup.

Liza: We all do. How about a large paper bag?

MM: All Right!

Liza: So my wonderful followers, which of the promotions do you like best?

MM: Let's not forget my former promos:
Liza: Ah yes the dam graffiti at Split Rock Resevoir.

MM: And this one. I risked my life putting this up.

Liza: Ah, Hawk View at Wildcat Ridge. Yes, you could have been picked off by the predator birds flying about. A few have made a run at Jess.

MM: And finally, Jonathan Wood's Beaver Pond.

Liza: Is there some reason why you made the sign so clownish. Honestly, it looks like the signs I make.

MM: You don't like the signs you make?

Liza: Between us, I like yours better.

MM: Really?

Liza: Truly. You have a gift, Maniac. It's going to get me arrest, but you clearly have a gift.

MM: *Preening* Compliments feel sooooo good. Please vote for your favorite promo. Sadly the small NYC picture cannot be voted for. *sniff* 

To vote, leave a comment below or try that silly voting thingie on the right.

Liza: If I put the poll up. It's not very user friendly. 

MM: Okay, leave a comment below. 

Liza: I promise not to erase your comments.

MM: I can't believe you did that.

Liza: Me either! I was simply trying to highlight the lovely compliment Allison wrote and suddenly it declared the comment deleted.

MM: Liza's bad. 

Liza: *nods* My bad.

No comments:

Post a Comment

Authors love to get comments. It's candy to our souls.
Please take the time to leave one.

After 3 days, comments require moderation.